Seriously. I have no motivation. And it is so frustrating. Because I love being motivated. I get in a groove where I just GET THINGS DONE. And it feels great. But lately: nada, zilch, zippo. And that is not good. Because that leads to all the negative talk and the settling in of the shoulda, woulda, coulda's. Hate those guys. But they are most definitely hanging around. I currently do the bare minimum to keep the house functioning but it really isn't where I want it to be. I think it probably has something to do with being off the medication. Maybe. Or maybe that is just my 'excuse du jour'.
So I have been making lists. I like lists now because this is how I approach them: 'These are things I want to get done.' Not the big bad 'HAVE TO DO' list, the one that makes you feel bad. And not the one that puts you into such negative place that you are paralyzed. But rather the 'I am going to love getting these things finished and I will feel so good crossing it off' kind of list. These are lists I like. I will even put down the last few things I actually did finish so that I can start with a few things crossed off. Nothing like a pat on the back right from the start.
And I leave my little pile of lists on the kitchen table or entry way. This keeps it easily accessible to me for updating and crossing off, reminds me of something else I could get done, and just in case the man feels motivated he can see what needs to be done.
(Aside - is it not amazing the capacity that a man has for NOT seeing things? What is that? Do they really not see, or is it just that they assume someone else will take care of it. I don't get it.)
Ironically the Man is a bit more motivated these days. He is on some new meds that he thinks is helping. And I realize that maybe I shouldn't be spilling the beans about his HIPAA stuff but since he doesn't even read this blog he won't know. Unless one of you go blabbing it. So please don't.
(Another aside - one thing that really does not go over well is when you look at one of your lists and something has been added to it. Not in your hand writing mind you. WTF. I'm just saying.)
Some more things that make my lists work for me:
- I list small items, not big ones. I've made the mistake in the past of putting Laundry on my list. Well, dang, that never gets all the way done. So now I will say whites through laundry or all blankets and towels through laundry. That is much easier to cross off.
- I will some times put very obvious, immediate things (empty dishwasher) as well as more random things (clean grout in guest bath) on the same list. Go for the easy, gotta do them anyway things and cross it off. Then the only things left are the more demanding ones but somehow they are easier because you have all this crossed off stuff to admire.
- I create multiple lists for different areas. Right now I have an inside list, an outside list and a kind of errand list. And I am not sure why it is not overwhelming me to have more than one. I guess if it were all on one list it would be way too big. So breaking it down makes it more palatable. And achievable.
- I do not live or die by my lists. Really. Don't forget that these are just the things I'd really like to get done.
- If I lose a list, oh well.
- If I get overwhelmed by a list then I make easier things on the next one so that I can get some crossing off going. That is the goal, lots of crossing off.